i cant carry on like this

This is not what it is supposed to be like and frankly I'm sick of it.
See my love, the idea was that because you exude this fee spirit and relaxed attitude, you were supposed to gel with me and hopefully rub off on me so as to complement my free spirit but it seems like I have had the rug pulled from under my feet cause hell this is crap.
What is this with you and all the hidden issues? There is no way I can compete with your past esp. since I know nothing about it and even now, about 6 months later, you still refuse to let me in on. For a man who has it in his head that I'm perfect for him and you want to marry me, you sure have a very funny way of showing it. I will not thrive on hidden agendas and secrets that I have no idea of.
Its already bad enough that I come from a world completely parallel from yours and I have every desire to understand and learn about your world but I cant walk around in the dark no more – you need to let me in and guide me at least for the first time.
I would like to believe that I'm the type of woman made of that really strong tuff that can take and handle a lot but its times like this when I know I have reached my limit.
I cant carry on like this and its time I let you know.